The Ubiquitous 25 Things About Me

I've seen this done in many ways. Chad Finn on his "Touching All the Bases" (for my money, the best general Boston-based sports fan blog I've seen...a great blog even if you're NOT a huge sports fan) has done 50 things about him. Others (the Digital Backpacker, and my wife) have wimped out and done 7 things about them. Because I strive to be at least half as good as Chad, I'll do 25.

So without any further ado, "25 Things About Me That Others Might Not Know".

1.) I was born a woman. Okay, no I wasn't, but sometimes I wish I had been, and here's why: women have the biological opportunity to give birth, and I feel left out. I'd be the most pathetic maternity patient you've ever seen, but it is quite possible that giving birth might make all my other maladies seem so small that I wouldn't complain about them any more...I probably wouldn't complain about them any less, either.
2.) I really don't like people much. Without humans there would be no war: think about THAT for a minute.
3.) Have you ever noticed I'm a little bit passive aggressive? Some might might take my procrastination and forgetfulness at face value, but really it's a cleverly crafted ploy to stonewall and derail the good intentions of others. See #2.
4.) The other teachers at my school see my choice to eat lunch alone in my classroom as one of three things: A) snobbery, B) misanthropy (See #2) or C) introversion. I will eliminate "A": I am not a snob. But I am an introvert, which never fails to amaze people after they've seen me interact with a bunch of seventh graders, or act in some public capacity. I come off as an outgoing individual who actually enjoys the company of others. In reality, this couldn't be farther from the truth. Which goes back to #2.
5.) My all time favorite Red Sox player is Dwight Evans. He embodied everything I admire about baseball: quiet determination, shutting up and doing one's job, sacrificing oneself for a greater purpose, intelligence, and a freakin' cannon of an arm. When I first started watching the Red Sox, Butch Hobson was my guy. He'd hit 25 home runs in about 400 at bats, make the most incredible diving stops you've ever seen, then nimbly jump to his feet and fire the ball with pinpoint accuracy...right into the 13th row. Then he'd get up, dust himself off, and rearrange the bone chips in his maraca of a right elbow, spit, and get ready to do it all over again. Apparently all his elbow damage led to a habit of snorting up the third base line during the post-game spread. He was a gamer, but was definitely Brittany Spears to Dwight Evans' Lena Horne.
6.) To keep with the Red sox theme: I didn't cry when he left, but I did go into a prolonged fugue state when Nomar was traded during the 2004 World Series Championship Season™. Sure, by the time he was done with the Red Sox the steroids (what, you didn't know?) had lost their effectiveness, and he was a shadow of his former self, but there was a time when he was heir to Dwight Evans in my eyes. At the time I did not see what the team was seeing, and my 36 year old mind couldn't comprehend the complexities of things grown ups have to do. I'm older now--almost 40--and a little more mature now. I get it now, and I forgive you, Red Sox front office. (A World Series Championship went a long way...)
7.) Sometimes I wonder how I got to be 40, holding down a big person's job, raising a family, happily married, when I'm probably no more mentally mature than I was when I was fifteen. Well, maybe that's an exaggeration, but it's not as far off as you might think.
8.) Being a dad is the toughest job I've ever loved.
9.) I am a closet fan of Pink. Frankly, this is the least embarrassing of my guilty pleasures, so I'll let it be the only one I tell you about now. If you pay attention, I'm sure others will surface. (I'm sure the random ABBA reference will slip out every now and then...dang it, I gave you a freebie there!)
10.) My mind is more mathematical than it is sometimes given credit for. Right now I am on #10, which makes me 2/5 of the way done. That's 40% for all of you keeping score at home.
11.) My birth certificate identifies Hyannis, Massachusetts as my place of birth. That makes me an honorary Kennedy...and a flatlander to all y'all.
12.) My favorite teacher of all time was Mr. Bob Stevens of Temple, Maine. He was one of my high school social studies teachers at Mt. Blue High School and much of my conversational/discussion-based approach to the classroom is pilfered directly from him. Another great one was Mr. Dave Karkos at Wilton Academy/Central School. I had him for 8th grade science. Their unifying characteristic was the abandonment of traditional methods in favor of discussion and exploration. Mr. Stevens was probably the one teacher who made me consider teaching at the earliest time. Mr. Karkos is the teacher I think of now most often when I am trying to get kids interested in science. I think "WWMKD?"
13.) In high school I was the worst science student on the face of the planet. Probably not, I guess, but of the "college-bound" kids I hung out with, I was about as science-stupid as they come. It wasn't until I was already certified in social studies and married that I began to consider science as even worthy of my attention. It all began in my garden...
14.) Ray Bradbury is my literary hero. Sometimes a little precious, but occasionally great enough to evoke tears, I really enjoy his short stories most. "At the End of the Ninth Year", in Quicker than the Eye is one of the most brilliant pieces of literature I've ever read. Ditto for the novel Something Wicked This Way Comes.
15.) Once in Mr. Paperback in Bangor I looked up from what I was browsing and saw Stephen King standing right next to me. I was awed. I smiled with recognition, he smiled back, and we went back to what we were doing. Unless I've got it all wrong, that is the kind of encounter that makes Mr. King enjoy living in Maine. We see him as one of us, no different from anyone else. Of course that's not the real reason I didn't say anything to him...I think I was so nervous I was afraid to throw up on him. Seriously, have you read The Dark Tower series? Man, that is mind-blowing.
16.) I spent one year in grad school at the University of Tennessee in Knoxville. It was the best waste of $15,000 I've ever perpetrated, as I realize I was not made to: a) be a political scientist or b)live in the south.
17.) It gives me great pleasure to be presumed conservative because of my short hair and conservative appearance. This can be a pretty good tool when one practices subversion.
18.) My extended family nickname is "Gama" (short "a", like "llama") which is short for "Bagama". It was Mike's daughter who gave me that name, and it is a part of my identity--I am Dave, I am husband, I am father, I am brother, I am Mr., I am...Gama.
19.) My favorite novel is To Kill a Mockingbird. When I first read it as a senior in high school I found myself weeping uncontrollably and not understanding why. To this day, I find that to be the defining moment in my relationship with literature.
20.) If I could choose one lifetime achievement from this list: write the Great American Novel, be inducted in the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame, or make it to Cooperstown, I would choose the Great American Novel. As I mentioned back in #15, there are fewer people lined up to get a piece of writers...which also goes back to #2. (You thought I'd forgotten, didn't you?)
21.) 80% of the way there. The 80's were an abysmal time, what with Reagan, George H.W. Bush, and Poison. 80 was the number Lincoln was talking about when he said "four-score...". Air is 80% nitrogen, which always surprises me. 80/20 cotton/poly is a waste of space. 100% cotton or not at all.
22.) Nothing makes me happier than a summer day spent planning a project at the house, investing some sweat equity, and enjoying the fruits of our labors by day's end. Nothing.
23.) If I could go to one foreign country it would be Portugal. I have no idea why, except having read Michener's The Drifters and thinking it sounded pretty cool to go tramping about Europe and Africa, and especially Portugal. If I had to be dropped off in another country not in North America for the rest of my life, I think I'd hope for New Zealand. They speak English there, after a fashion. And I might run into some Hobbitses.
24.) When I am at school, I forget I have a life outside. When I am at home, I forget school. It can be pretty handy having that kind of filter, but I also believe it leads to much of my procrastination on menial administrative tasks from work. If I'm not there, the need to do it is not immediate.
25.) Coming up with 25 things about myself has been interesting for me, but, I'm sure, painful for you. I don't really think I'm that interesting.